To Be Loved
by vulpixfairy
Summary: When Xiao Qiao overhears some nasty comments about her not fit to be Zhou Yu's wife, she becomes anxious and depressed. Zhou Yu must make her see the way he loves her to dispel her worries. XQ/ZY Some angst but mostly fluffy romance to warm the heart.


Author's note: Helloooo! It's been ages but I'm back from the dead..sort of :) I know I'm supposed to be working on another story but got a bit sidetracked because of my two casual jobs and volunteer work. Doesn't leave me much to do writing and other hobbies. I was so happy when DW7 came out and the interaction between the Qiaos and their husbands made me feel happy. Anyway here's another story of my one of my fave couples. Some love and fluff to read!

Disclaimer: I do not own Koei's Dynasty Warriors and I am only writing this for literary pleasure and nothing more.

**17/7/2013:** Just spruced it up a bit. Nothing to greatly affect the story.

* * *

><p><strong>To Be Loved<strong>

"I still cannot believe that Lady Xiao Qiao is still here under Lord Zhou Yu's wing...you would have thought that he would have been sick of her by now..."

The cutting remark made Xiao Qiao pause in her task to do up her hair. It also made her feel hurt and angry. How could someone say something so horrible about her and her husband? Placing the intricate accessories down, she silently tiptoed near the thin walls and leaned against them. She was able to hear voices coming through. The palace maidens were gossiping again. Normally the young woman would have turned away and ignored it but the mention about her and her husband piqued her curiosity. She held her breath and continued to listen.

"What does she have to capture his lordship's heart?"

"She is one of the Qiao beauties. She is really strong in battle and is beautiful just like her sister. Lord Zhou Yu assigns me to watch over her when she is battling in the same field he is in."

Xiao Qiao smiled when she recognized the second voice. Xiao Xing was her personal lady-in-waiting who was under her husband's employment.

"If she is as you described, how come Lord Zhou Yu has increasingly refused to bring her along to his meetings, his trips or campaigns?"

"I wonder if it is true...perhaps she is not good enough, she appears to be slacking."

"I can understand why Lord Sun Ce has Lady Da Qiao by his side. She is divine like the Goddess of Mercy. But Lady Xiao Qiao? Personally I do not think she is as beautiful or graceful like her sister. She's just a little girl. Surely Zhou Yu would have searched for someone...stronger, more intelligent...I do not see how such childishness and immaturity can capture his heart like that..."

Xiao Qiao felt her chest ache and clench sharply. She grew greatly saddened at the cruel words. Her heart felt as heavy as lead. Her husband did seem adamant for her to stay behind while her sister is allowed to go with her lord...but that couldn't be true. Zhou Yu loved her...right?

'I am strong...I know I am...I may not be as clever or smart as my husband but...'

"I agree with you. I wonder if he will eventually be tired of her silly antics and her childish attitude. She should grow up."

It literally took her breath away, choking her until the unsettled ache evolved into a deep gaping hole of despair.

'Am I really that childish...'

"How can you say all these horrible things behind our lady's back?" Xiao Xing's voice piped up sternly, "Lady Xiao Qiao is not as immature as you all think. She's been so sweet and kind to all of you and this is how you talk of her?"

The young woman felt grateful to Xiao Xing for defending her.

"But what about you, Xiao Xing? Did you not ever wish that you could take Lady Xiao Qiao's place to see Zhou Yu face to face? Don't you wish for him to gaze at you with love shining on his handsome face?"

"Even if I wish it so, it would be a fruitless endeavour. Lord Zhou Yu loves only Lady Xiao Qiao. I would not betray my lady and lord. My duty is to protect her and nothing else," Xiao Xing's voice was clear and unrelenting.

"You are just as pathetic as she is," the reply was fierce and filled with sneers, "I still think that Lady Xiao Qiao is not ever fit to be the wife of the wonderful and handsome Lord Zhou Yu."

"Ladies, please!" a new voice caught up with them, "Let us turn to more pleasant thoughts."

The voices were starting to fade away as the palace maidens continued their conversation down the hallway. Xiao Qiao slid down the wall, suddenly feeling faint. Her coiled hair slowly unfurled in wavy locks and partially covered her shocked face. She brought her hands to her chest to calm her anxious heart...was it true? Was she not fit to be Zhou Yu's beloved wife? She never doubted his love for her but the spiteful comments from the palace maidens made her think otherwise, the seeds of doubt starting to grow in her head...

"It's not true, Zhou Yu loves me and I love him. I am not a child to him…or am I?"

Xiao Qiao trembled with worry but eventually tried to stop her hands from shaking and got to her feet. She would show them that Zhou Yu truly loved her.

"No, I will show them. I will prove them wrong."

Suddenly waiting for dinner felt like an eternity. Xiao Qiao's fingers were still trembling when she redid her hair and finally fastened the butterfly hair ornaments into her hair...

* * *

><p>Zhou Yu and Sun Ce watched with pride as they watched their wives dance and sing together before them. It became a regular routine after dinner. The Qiao sisters would perform for their husbands and the rest of the court before retiring for the night.<p>

"I will never get tired of seeing our wives sing and dance each night, Zhou Yu. It really makes me appreciate that there is always something peaceful and beautiful amid this chaos."

"I agree with you, my friend. Indeed," Zhou Yu nodded as he watched Xiao Qiao, loving the way his beloved danced and sang.

Her exuberance and energetic spirit always flowed harmoniously with her sister's more mellow and gentle demeanor. And speaking of exuberance, Zhou Yu's smile diminished slightly. He noticed that even though his little beauty was smiling brightly as the sun as she danced, he observed a sliver of anxiety and sadness lingering in her eyes, which were suspiciously more damp than usual and red-rimmed. The smile seemed a bit forced and shaky. Her cheeks always had dimples when she truly smiled…and they weren't present. That would mean that something must have bothered his wife in his absence. As he mulled over this matter, he started to frown, catching Sun Ce's avid eyes.

"Hey, Zhou Yu, are you alright?" the strategist turned to his best friend who looked at him with concern.

"I am fine..." Zhou replied distractedly, his gaze still fixed on his wife.

All of a sudden, a squeaky shriek alerted his senses. He immediately stood up with alarm when he saw a maid crashing into Xiao Qiao, causing her to slip and fall clumsily onto the ground in front of an equally surprised Da Qiao. The wine within the small cups spilled over the younger Qiao's clothes and her face before they crashed on the ground into shards. The crowd gasped and an awkward silence filled the area.

"Lady Xiao Qiao! Are you alright?" Xiao Xing who was serving Zhou Yu hastily placed her own tray elsewhere before she ran forward and knelt beside her lady. She helped Xiao Qiao onto her knees, using her long cotton sleeves to wipe away the drops of wine still lingering on her lady's cheeks, "Your clothes…I will get you a new robe at once, my lady."

"Mei mei!" Da Qiao regained her senses at the maid's voice and joined her sister's side, frantically brushing her body to check whether she was badly injured, "What happened? No, Xiao Xing, that won't be necessary. She can wear some of my clothes in the meantime."

Zhou Yu discreetly looked around. It was then he observed that the corridor carpet looked unusually crumpled and was pulled in the opposite direction his wife fell. He inwardly gasped. Someone had purposely pulled the carpet to make his wife trip and fall during her dance routine. If she hadn't prepared to brace for the fall albeit in a clumsy fashion, she would have been more seriously injured and Da Qiao would have ended up falling with her. He was slowly burning in rage. Who would dare to hurt his beloved?

His eyes narrowed in suspicion when he saw that the maiden who crashed into his wife didn't look at all remorseful of her actions. She looked like she relished in his beloved's misfortune. The rage he held faded to an uncomfortable disturbance within his heart when he saw the identical vindictive stares directed at Xiao Qiao from the other palace maidens within the vicinity.

'What's going on?'

"My goodness, please pardon my carelessness," the palace maiden said in a sickeningly sweet voice.

"As do I..." the second maiden spoke up, "It seems that the carpet wasn't properly dusted…"

"I guess it goes to show one of the Qiao sisters is better than the other..." another maiden echoed from another corner of the room.

The whole room was filled with murmurs from the other ministers and generals, the atmosphere becoming heavy and tense. The Wu strategist, filled with disbelief at the turn of events, turned back to his wife. Xiao Qiao was looking in his direction and what he saw made his heart still and crack. Her face had a horrified look and there were tears in her eyes. She looked absolutely frightened and she was shaking like a leaf. Da Qiao and Xiao Xing were worried. The young woman hadn't responded to their inquiries.

"Mei mei?"

"My lady?"

Xiao Qiao didn't say a word. Instead she stood up slowly. As she did, the butterfly hair ornaments slid from her locks and fell down onto the marble floor, the fine crystal butterflies splintering into shards.

"Please excuse me..."

Her normally cheerful voice was now quiet, subdued and solemn. With that, she turned around and strolled away, not bothering to pick up her hairpins or her fans. As she took each stride, her hair unbound like silken rivers. The echoes of her footsteps eventually turned silent until she left the hall and into the royal garden.

"Xiao…mei mei, wait!"

Da Qiao immediately stood up to follow her sister but she stopped when Zhou Yu suddenly rushed by her. He picked up a single unbroken hair ornament on the floor before he swiftly followed Xiao Qiao's route. She was left standing, stunned with wonder and hope.

'Lord Zhou Yu...'

"My lady!" Xiao Xing prepared to follow until Da Qiao gently held her back, "Lady Da Qiao?"

"Don't worry, Xiao Xing. Lord Zhou Yu will fix everything…"

* * *

><p>'Why?'<p>

As soon as she was outside, Xiao Qiao covered her face in anguish as she ran out to the gardens. She wanted to get away from there, from those horrid stares, the terrible grins on the maidens' faces and worst of all, the shocked and distressed look on her husband's face. He was really going to hate her now, she was sure of it. He would shun her...he wouldn't love her anymore...the more she thought about it becoming a reality, it became so painful to bear...

'I have shamed my lord...I have shamed my sister...I have shamed Wu...I am not a dancer...I am not a fighter...'

The sounds of rippling water slowed her down. She found herself near the edge of the carp pond. Gasping softly from emotional stress and exhaustion, she finally collapsed on her knees. The hot sorrow-filled tears she held back were released, trickling down her flushed cheeks. She brushed the stray locks behind her ears and looked down to see her reflection in the water. Sighing softly, she tried to recall what had happened earlier. She was humiliated...the hurtful words from the gossiping maidens had made her lose concentration while she was dancing and singing. Normally she loved to lavish all the attention of all the people who found delight in their dances but tonight it felt different. It brought back unwanted memories when visitors who came to see their father often compared her with Da Qiao when they were children, saying how her sister was more beautiful, more talented, more refined and more graceful than she was…Da Qiao was perfect...

"I am nothing..." Xiao Qiao's whisper carried in the wind.

She held out her hands...the hands that held those fans...suddenly...they just looked so...useless and ugly.

The tears dangled from her cheeks and fell into the pond water, making silvery ripples in their wake, "Oh Lord Zhou Yu, I am not worthy of your love...I brought dishonor to the name of Qiao and Wu..."

"You will say no such things!"

She gasped when a firm and familiar voice sounded out of nowhere and muscular arms wrapped around her lithe form swiftly. A pair of soft lips graced her temple and she felt a strong body curl near her like a warm cocoon. She made no move.

"Because none of them are true..."

"But you saw me!" the young woman exclaimed and roughly pulled away from Zhou Yu, scrambling away from him. The man looked on with surprise, "You saw me fall! Right in front of the whole court! I am supposed to be as graceful and skilled at dancing like my sister! I was wrong! What they said is true!"

"Wha-?" Zhou Yu was flabbergasted. The ferocity in his wife's voice caught him off guard but he knew she was hurting deep inside, "What makes you-"

"Why me?! Why did you choose me?!" she screamed at him, desperation evident in her pleading tone, "You should hate me now! I am not fit for you! You are as wondrous as the Heavenly Emperor and I am second to none! I cannot match up to my sister! What they said is true! I am only a child! You could have someone better! Someone more beautiful! Someone cleverer! Someone stronger! You could have chosen one of them instead of having me as your wife!"

Her lips quivered. She struggled to swallow the large lump in her throat. She wanted to scream and sob. She shied away from Zhou Yu's advances yet she wanted him to hug her because everything always turned out when he did that. She shook her head. No, she was not worthy anymore. She was undeserving of his loving embraces, his gentle kisses and the tender looks he gave her...

"Please...just go...leave me...send me out if you have to...I don't want to stain your honour and reputation..."

Zhou Yu studied his wife with defeated eyes and an aching heart. She faced away from him, feeling she was no longer deserving to see his face. He made his way slowly to her, trapping her against the willow tree. He could literally feel the sadness and pain radiating strongly from every pore of her body. In a flash, it was all clear to him what happened back at the dinner banquet. Despite being married, he was still sought after by many young women because of his looks. He mentally kicked himself for not seeing the signs sooner. He should have known that some of the maidens were getting spiteful and jealous over their happy marriage and told such hurtful rumors behind their backs, especially about his wife. He made a silent reminder to make sure that he would assign new bodyguards and maidens with better character when he couldn't be there for her.

It was pure poison, it was threatening to take his beloved away from him.

He would not allow that to happen. NEVER! Over his dead body, he wouldn't...

"You do not quite seem to understand how deep my love for you runs, my Xiao..."

He finally trapped her in his embrace. Defeated that she couldn't escape, she fell limp like a child's doll.

"Why do you call yourself unworthy when you mean so much to me..." he whispered tenderly as he picked up one of her hands and interlocked their fingers, "I love how you make me smile and laugh when I feel unhappy and stressed. I love how you always make me see all the wonderful and simple things the world has to offer in this chaos. I love how your kisses and hugs make me forget my worries. I love how you manage to put up with me when I couldn't be here for you all the time, to make me remember that you're always waiting for me when I return..."

He dared to inch closer with each passionate sentence.

"Why should you tell me to hate you when I love you so much..." he ran his free hand through her hair, kissing her forehead. He tilted her head to see her tear stained face. He smiled tenderly at her.

"Does it really matter to me if you can't match up to your sister. No, it doesn't because she is supposed to make her lord Sun Ce happy. Hmmm?" his deep voice was alluring and gentle. Xiao Qiao laid her head on his chest but still said nothing, "Can she make me happy like you do? No, she can't. Why do I need another woman who is beautiful, strong and clever..."

He released her hand to tilt her face, wiping away the tears away from her swelling eyes. She was still so wondrous...so innocent and most of all, beautiful.

"When everything I want and need...the love of my heart and soul is right here...with me..."

He leaned forward and pressed their foreheads together, his dark deep eyes boring into her own...

"How can you say all those things without knowing how much I love you..."

Xiao Qiao whimpered, her eyes impossibly brimming with more tears.

"Are you now saying that I am not worthy of you?"

The tears spilled once again, her heart beating so fast like she was doing a dancing marathon. She weakly shook her head, willing for him to stop but he didn't seem to pay any heed and continued.

"Are you saying that you don't love me?"

'No no no...'

"Do you hate me?"

'How can you say that? No...it cannot be...'

"Then if it makes you feel better, maybe I should be the one who should leave-"

"NO!"

At once, Xiao Qiao wrapped her arms tightly around her husband's waist, sobbing and crying into his silk robes. She shook violently, unable to contain the ever growing hurricane of turmoil and pain inside her heart. Zhou Yu gently hushed her, allowing her to cry into his chest. He combed her hair and pressed kisses on every patch of velvety skin he could find. Her disguised mask of sunshine finally cracked. Within the tiny ravines was a lost young woman who needed to be reassured that she was loved.

"M-My lord, no more! Please...it hurts!"

"Shhhhh...hush...my Xiao...everything will be fine..."

"I love you! I love you so much! So much that it tears me apart!" Xiao Qiao babbled brokenly, shaking her head, "You are worthy of everything to me!"

"My silly little flower…you are so precious to me..." he whispered affectionately, allowing a stray tear to streak a porcelain cheek. He sighed with relief. His beloved was finally coming to her senses. Inwardly he thanked the Gods that his beautiful wife still had love for him, "Are you going to let spiteful gossip play with your mind? Hmmm?"

"But part of what they said was true: you never let me come with you!" she protested as she wiped away her tears, looking up at him with an angry pout, "You never want me to fight by your side! Are you ashamed of me? Are you not proud of me? Is this why you never take me along? Jie jie always get to go with Lord Sun Ce but I never get to come along!"

Zhou Yu swallowed a lump in his throat uncomfortably. He never thought his wife felt neglected. He was most mortified to fathom the notion that she really thought he was ashamed of her. But there was a reason why he couldn't and wouldn't take her along.

"Xiao, it is nothing of the sort. I must keep you safe. At least here..." he paused, shivering. He had to kill soldiers, generals and other warlords to realize Wu's superiority and to bring peace to this broken land. He could bear with it but the vision of his wife not breathing and her pale lifeless body bathed in a puddle of blood was his worse nightmare. He couldn't allow it to happen. He wouldn't let the blood spill onto her and taint her sweet innocence and purity, "You do not have to share the burden of bloodshed and death with me."

"But I want to!" Xiao Qiao vehemently countered and hugged him tightly, while sniffling, "I do not care if my hands have to be stained with blood forevermore. I want to be there as your equal. I will do whatever it takes to make you proud of me..."

Zhou Yu cupped her face and she leaned into the warm palm. He tucked her as close to his body as he could."Is this really what you want, my love?"

"I will die for you if you wish...I will follow you everywhere you go," she looked straight into his eyes, "You cannot stop me..."

"My little flower...I cannot promise you that you will come with me and Sun Ce on the next campaign," at this, her eyes lowered back down, disappointment filled in her irises, "But..."

Her downcast eyes re-lit with hope.

"I can promise that I will bring you with me when I tour the kingdom and visit the villages on my future trips outside the palace. It is not fair on you when your sister always goes with Lord Sun Ce and I leave you behind. I have seen some sights on my previous trips. I wanted to bring you there but never found the right time. And perhaps after several of those outings, then will l consider whether you can come along for the future campaigns of Wu. I cannot bear to lose you...can you accept that for now?"

Xiao Qiao cocked her head, gazing at her husband. Her handsome, wonderful, clever, loving and protective husband.

"It will do for now, my lord..." she said softly and a smile blossomed on her flushed face, "Remember, you made a promise."

"May Buddha steal my sword the moment I break it?" his eyes flashed something akin to humour.

She giggled, her misery vanishing as she revelled in her husband's loving and warm embrace.

"I will make sure that you will be treated with more respect back at the palace...those maidens involved in your fall will be promptly dismissed…" Zhou Yu's voice was now filled with seriousness, "I will never forgive anyone who belittled you."

"Please don't punish Xiao Xing. Let her stay," the young woman pleaded, "She is really good to me."

"I have a feeling you might say that. I will pay heed to it," he reached into his fold of his robes and pulled out the unbroken butterfly hair ornament. He delicately brushed some of her hair aside and pinned it neatly within the soft curls, "Remind me to get more of those butterfly hair ornaments for you. The others are broken."

"No, my lord, this is fine. I don't need anymore...one is enough..." she closed her eyes, feeling his large palm against her cheek.

"So what do you say, my beloved...I hear the plum blossoms are in season in a village just a day's ride from the palace. Will you journey there to watch them with me and perhaps spend the night there for the moon festival?"

Xiao Qiao's smile grew brighter. It was filled with escalating love and happiness. The misery and humiliation from the incident and all the bad feelings were washed away only to be replaced with a warmth that only her husband was able to give.

"But what about Lord Sun Ce and Jie Jie?" she frowned slightly.

"I am sure they can handle the kingdom without me for a few days," Zhou Yu said reassuringly, "After all...I made a promise, did I not?"

The handsome strategist looked down at his wife, his smile sweet and gentle. Her silk clothes were stained with wine, her hair disheveled and her face was rosy from crying so much. But the bright smile simply made her utterly and stunningly radiant as the dimples once more fashioned her cheeks. And he wouldn't have her in any other way...

"Yes, you did..."

She closed her eyes and sighed contently as she felt herself carried bridal style and a tender warm kiss placed on her lips...everything was alright. Her hero and her lord was here and nothing could possibly ruin this perfect moment.

Now comforted within her husband's strong aura, Xiao Qiao knew there was one thing the spiteful maidens could never have in their lifetime: the feeling of being loved by Zhou Yu...

**The End**


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